My ex-girlfriend turned up

Dear Tita,

I am so confused. Stella, an ex-girlfriend from five years ago, suddenly turned up in my office asking me to help her with her predicament. She said she is in a bad situation financially and needed my help to find work. I am already established with a good position and I do occasionally help people who have problems. I feel sorry for her now but I still recall the reason why we broke up.

I was madly in love with her and was even planning to ask her to marry me when I found out that she was secretly seeing another guy. I was crushed and it was a big blow to my ego. I knew that I was foolish to be crazy about a woman, who was 13 years younger than I, but I really believed that she was also in love with me. That episode left me with a broken heart.

My first instinct was to refuse Stella’s request. After five years, I could still remember how she hurt me. But she cried and begged me to help her. She said the man she left me for, abandoned her and their child. She had no one to turn to except me.

I felt sorry for her and I told her I would think about it. When I told my best friend about the problem, he told me not to be a sucker. He said she was just playing me for a fool and I shouldn’t be such a sap.

How do I handle this? I have gotten over her (although it took awhile), and I’m dating someone at the moment. But I must admit I do feel a bit sorry for Stella.

Any idea on what I should do?

CONFUSED

Dear Confused,

You should listen to your friend.

Stella has a lot of nerve begging for your help after what she did to you. You seem to be a compassionate guy who has a kind heart. But I think you should pass on this one. Somehow, I get the feeling that if you don’t watch out, you might get emotionally involved with Stella again if you fall for her sob story.

Please don’t forget how she hurt you once. You could get hurt again.

TITA