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Bacolod City, PhilippinesSaturday, August 25, 2012

How can I approach
my parents?

Dear Tita,

My parents were against my boyfriend, Chito, because he was a college dropout who spent most of his time with his barkada, who were also school dropouts. My mother said he would make my life miserable if I decide to marry him. One time, they caught me talking to Chito outside our gate and they shouted at him, driving him away. But no matter how they put him down, I was madly in love and I decided to elope with him when I found out I was pregnant. After a few days, we came back to beg for their forgiveness, but my parents cursed us and told me never to show my face to them again.

Chito took me to live with his widowed mother at their small house in a rough neighborhood. I was so miserable as his mother kept complaining about the added expense and how big a burden I was to them. I tried my best to get along with his family but they were all against me. I tried to ask help from my mother through a sympathetic neighbor of ours, but my mother sent word that I was no longer a part of our family, and that I should never show my face to them again. That was how bitter they felt towards me.

Things got worse when Chito and I began quarreling all the time. He resented my asking him not to go out with his barkada until late at night. Finally, one time he arrived late and was very drunk. When I tried to ask him why he was out late again, he got mad and shouted at me. I shouted back and he slapped me hard, despite my pregnancy. He even tried to kick me but I ran outside to our neighbor’s house. She brought me to her sister’s place so Chito couldn’t find me.

Now, I deeply regret not listening to my parents. Chito didn’t even look for me and I learned he is often with his barkada, drinking all day. I want to go home to my parents but I’m afraid they would berate me and throw me out for what I have done. I am so desperate. Please advise me what to do. Chito and I aren’t married up to now. I guess he doesn’t want to anymore.

REBELLIOUS DAUGHTER

Dear Rebellious Daughter,

You now realize how wrong it was for you to rebel against your parents. They could see the kind of man Chito was, but you refused to believe them. And so you are paying for your transgression.

The only thing you can do now is to throw yourself at their mercy. You have to beg for their forgiveness and ask them to help you. I am almost certain they won’t throw you out, especially in your condition.

Let this be a lesson to all the young women, who find themselves crazy in love with the wrong man. Listen to your parents.

TITA

 

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