My partner resents the
support I give to my kids

Dear Tita,

My wife Nits and I separated six years ago when she found out about Lucy, my mistress. Nits took our three kids with her to Iloilo where her parents are living. We agreed that I would send monthly support for them, especially since our kids were in school. After a year, Lucy and I decided to live together as she was already pregnant with our child. It wasn’t long before I found out Lucy’s true character.

Before we lived together, she was so sweet and caring and showered me with all the attention and understanding that Nits didn’t give me. That was the reason why I fell for her.

But after we lived together, Lucy became so demanding about money and kept complaining about the allowance I gave her. I tried to reason with her that I couldn’t give her the huge amounts she asked for, because I had to send monthly support to Nits and our kids. This was the cause of our frequent quarrels – money.

Lucy would shout and throw a tantrum if she didn’t get what she wanted; giving me the ‘silent treatment’ for days. My life became a nightmare as I was always tired from working all day and I had to contend with her black moods when I got home. One time, Nits sent our eldest child, Nanette, to see me and tell me that she needed a bigger amount for her high school graduation and a new dress for their prom. I couldn’t refuse as she is an honor student and is very active in their school. That night, when Lucy complained why I couldn’t give her the amount she was asking for, I had to tell her the truth. She flew into a rage and started breaking our expensive things in the house, warning me not to do this again.

I know now that I made a big mistake in choosing her to be my partner. My ex-wife had more grace and class than she does. I don’t know what to do.

REGRETTING HUSBAND

Dear Regretting Husband,

You must remember you are the one earning the money and Lucy can’t dictate to you what to do with it. She is just using you for all her ‘capritchos’ (expensive whims). The next time she complains about you giving your kids money, just remind her that you are lucky your wife didn’t file a case against the both of you. I can’t understand why you put up with a woman like that. Don’t you see she is just after your money?

Let this be a lesson to wayward husbands. Don’t do anything you might regret for the rest of your life!

TITA