My ex-husband blames me

TELL YOUR TITA

Dear Tita,

I left my husband, Joe, after 12 years of marriage as I couldn’t stand his oppressive ways and his playing around with his paramours. I took our daughter Gina with me to my parents’ house. Joe came for us and insisted that we go back home with him but I refused. He got angry and threatened me, so my father ordered him out of the house and warned him not to bother me again. Joe had to leave as he knew he couldn’t fight against my father, who was an ex-soldier. I was able to get a job and send Gina to school as Joe refused to send us money. He was very bitter for a long time.

Years passed and my parents died, leaving me the house and a small property in the south. I had to go to the south often to see to the property my parents left me. Gina had grown into a pretty teenager, who loved to go out with her friends to the mall and other fun places.

When Gina was 16, she had a boyfriend named Carlo, the son of a rich Chinese businessman. I warned her not to get too close to Carlo as I heard he was a notorious playboy. But Gina would sneak behind my back to go out on dates with Carlo. One day, she came to me crying that she was pregnant with Carlo’s baby. I was so shocked that I broke down. I called for Carlo who came to the house immediately. He promised to stand by Gina no matter what. But when he told his parents, they vehemently objected to his marrying her as he was only 16 just like Gina.

Later, I heard from my friends that Carlo’s parents did not like their son to marry Gina because she came from a broken home. I told Gina never to see Carlo again. His parents sent him to Manila that week. To add to my problems, Joe came to see me when he learned about what happened to our daughter. He blamed me for everything, saying this would never have happened if I didn’t bring our daughter when I left him. He keeps telling everybody that this is all my fault.

What should I do?

EX-WIFE

Dear Ex-Wife,

Don’t let Joe get you down. He is just sour-graping, making you feel guilty for leaving him. Instead of helping you and your daughter, he is blaming you for everything that happened. Ignore him. Just focus on helping Gina through this trying time in her life. You both can get through this. Try to see that she finishes her college course so she can work and raise her baby properly. Good luck.

TITA

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