How can I marry him?

Dear Tita,

I have been in love with my boyfriend, Vic, for almost two years. My parents approve of him and so, this year, we started talking about getting married. A few weeks ago, Vic invited me to go with him to visit his parents and siblings in Bayawan, Negros Oriental.

I was surprised (and disappointed) to see that their house was a dirty broken-down place, where chickens and pigs roamed about the front yard. The toilet was in a small outhouse where you had to squat and the bathing area was outside the kitchen, enclosed by old, smelly bamboo walls that anyone could see through.

His family was not what I expected. Vic is good-looking and is neat, while his family was unkempt, uneducated, lazy and a bit rude. Their eating habits were so atrocious that I always lost my appetite during mealtimes. After two days, I couldn’t stand it anymore and so I asked Vic to bring me home.

Vic was so apologetic about my bad experience at their place. He said he hoped I didn’t change the way I felt about him. When I told my parents about what I saw, they told me to think things over very carefully before I decide to marry Vic. Even my friends said the same thing.

I have always wanted a beautiful wedding attended by my family and friends. I can’t imagine Vic’s family being there. It would ruin everything. How can I marry him with this thing weighing on my mind?

CONFUSED

Dear Confused,

Before you decide on anything, you and Vic have a lot of important issues to iron out. Yes, they may seem to be unkempt, uncouth, rude and lazy, but these people are his family.

Do you expect Vic to give them up to marry you? How can your marriage work if this happens? Don’t forget, if you marry him, they will be your children’s grandparents. Think this over very carefully and then make your decision.

TITA

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