The love of Vivien ‘Beng’ Picart Villanueva for her son, Ian Gabriel, or Iggy, has compelled her to overcome her reluctance to approach people, evens strangers, for help so that her boy can lead a healthy life once more.

It is the same love for Iggy that drew scores of former classmates at the St. la Salle Integrated school –both in the elementary and secondary levels – to mobilize resources to hold various fund-raising activities to help the Villanueva family meet the financial requirements for Iggy’s treatment.

Iggy, a member of the USLS-IS Class of 2007 and a sophomore at the College of St. Benilde, where he earned full scholarship in the Business Administration program and played with the basketball varsity team, was diagnosed on Jan. 6 this year to have acute myologeous leukemia, which requires a long and expensive treatment procedures, including chemotheraphy, blood transfusions a bone marrow transplant.

On his 20th birthday on Jan. 14, his friends surprised him with a party in his hospital room in Manila.

Untreated, Iggy has just four months to live, said his mother, who called herself  in her first public letter on Jan. 20, a one-woman army with the laptop and her mind as the weapons in her battle to help save her son. Iggy’s father, Jude, is working as a seaman with a Norwegian cruise ship, thus Vivien wrote,” I am literally alone…it’s just Iggy and myself in the hospital”.

The Villanuevas have four children – Bea Therese, 17, and twins Eli Matthew and Ely Nicolai, 6 years old.

In her letter, Beng describes Iggy as a well-rounded individual and athletic boy, a leader, an honor student – from grade school to college. He was a taekwondo jin, a track and field athlete and a basketball player.

In her “desperate plea”, she turned to the Internet, among others, and  prayed for a network of people to eventually “become part of the cycle of Iggy’s healing, especially that medical expenses are expected to go beyond P5 million. Thinking of how many zeroes the figure has made me want to give up, but I know I wont and I can’t, she wrote in her emails to friends, relatives, even strangers, , adding that she will do everything to save her son.

The appeal eventually touched people’s hearts – even from those outside the country, Among those who committed to help are Iggy’s former classmates at St. La Salle, who immediately pooled efforts and resources to line up activities – from bloodletting campaign , a Leukemia Awareness Week at USLS-IS starting Feb. 1,  a futdal tournament on Feb. 7 and 8, an ‘iCANCERvive party for a cause’ held Friday where organizers sold shirts and baller bands, a basketball fundraiser yesterday and a benefit concert on Feb. 28.

As of last week, Viven said, the combined fund-raising efforts have raised P1 million. In response, Vivien expressed her thanks anew “for the unconditional love that you have enveloped our whole family, most especially Iggy. Support, she added, poured in all forms and never seems to stop…prayers, encouragement, food, favors, money,  medicines, blood, friendship… you name it, we got it.”

She acknowledges the wide support she got through her first email. “ I did not expect that the first letter I wrote would have this great an impact in our lives.  But by the grace of God, that letter proved to be my greatest weapon in Iggy’s fight. Our immediate circle of friends sent the letter to their other friends who sent it to their friends.  It just grew….thus, even total strangers became our friends….an unending cycle…,” she said in another letter. Though we may be facing the greatest challenge of our life, we know that God Loves Us. We have surrendered everything to our Father…Thy will be done…No bitterness nor  anger in our hearts…We live each day at a time…, the mother added.

While the wide support is encouraging, Vivien still  has to contend also with concerns over the bone marrow aspiration now scheduled on Feb. 27 – a total of 28 days after the eight day of post chemotherapy  to really determine if he is ready for the procedure as chemotherapy was delayed for two  weeks because of Iggy’s lung and liver complications. 

She knows “there is nothing certain even on a day to day basis. We may have good days, but we may also have bad days.  The full effect of his chemo will be evident in the next days to come…mouth sores, nausea, loss of appetite, hair loss, diarrhea, fever, nose-bleeding, etc. ,” she wrote to her supporters in a follow-up letter.

The bone marrow transplant requires 40 days of confinement in an isolated room, Vivien said, adding her son got worried his friends may not be able to visit him but it’s a good thing, she added, that visitors will be allowed “but with special gowns, booties, caps, masks and sanitized to the max, although entry is limited”.

While she keeps her optimism high, she  admits that the side effects of the medical procedures and medications  does affect her son’s spirits.  “I’m helpless on this part. How I wish that I can get the physical discomforts away from him. The best that I can do during this time is just be there for him and urge him not to give up,” she further wrote.

“Iggy, she said has lost a lot of weight— from a good 165 pounds to 126 pounds and still going down…But he is still conscious, walks to the comfort room. He is constantly tired though. Physically weak, but he is strong…I know…he can smile, laugh and be in good spirits.  In fact every time anyone asks “how are you?” his answer is always “akay”…he does not dwell on self pity.  I see him angry and impatient at times. A good sign, if you’d ask me,” she said in her letter.

I am so overwhelmed and amazed with the support we are receiving.  Miracles happen everyday since Jan. 6  We are living witness.  I know that more miracles will happen.  Goodness is all around, God is all around.  Its like the story of the loves and the fishes, or the wedding wine…bottomless. Our blessings came from family, friends, and yes, total strangers. 

In the same letter, she reiterated her appreciation to  “the catalysts of what is happening – Iggy’s friends: more specifically his best friends since grade school and other members of USLS-IS batch 2007 and his girlfriend of course…It is such a humbling experience that these young pure hearted people gave their all for Iggy.  As one parent put it, it has taught us, the adults the true meaning of brotherhood, selflessness, and generosity.  In this times, this indeed made parents proud of their children.  It was because of them that everything kept on growing….networks, friendships, support of all kinds. They are my modern day heroes.  Their enthusiasm is so contagious that Iggy’s fight has reached other continents as well.  I am very thankful that we live in a time that computers and cell phones are an everyday thing.”

Though we may be facing the greatest challenge of our life, she admitted, we know that God Loves Us. We have surrendered everything to our Father…Thy will be done…No bitterness nor  anger in our hearts…We live each day at a time…

She ended with an appeal for people to pass her letter about Iggy’s plight to others. “I know that these words are not enough to thank you all but this comes from the heart.  God is Good! God bless you all….,” she ended.

Those who want to share anything with the Villanueva family may course their help or inquiries through Rhoderick Samonte, director of the USLS Center for  International and External Linkages, Tel. No. +63-34-435-2594. Or they may check the following websites set up by Iggy’s friends:  www.uslsbatch2007.multiply.com, www.iggyvillanueva.wordpress.com
www.facebook.com  (search for Iggy’s friends).

A Mother’s
Valentine’s Day Prayer

Vivien Picart Villanueva  sent an email early this week upon the request of StarLife. She shares  her latest thoughts in her letter below.

God blessed me with four beautiful children — Ian Gabriel, Bea Therese, Eli Matthew and  Ely Nicolai. I love all my children equally.  But I know my other three children will forgive me this time if I speak of my love for Iggy during these time.

When I was told that Iggy had leukemia, my world seemed to stop.  I felt that a ton of bricks fell over my entire being. My first question was ‘Why him?  This cannot be happening to my Iggy.’ I had a major decision-making to do right away.  Between the doctors and myself, we debated if we should tell the truth to him.  I said, I will tell him the truth.

My son and I have a unique relationship.  I am glad that I was a young mother.  I had Iggy when I was just 21. There are no secrets between us. We’ve been through a lot — the Baguio earthquake in 1990, the PAL crash landing in Bacolod in 1998, major family crises, school ups and downs, love life, our family life, or even just the plain mundane everyday happenings in our lives. I must say, there has been  NO communication gap between us. We have moments when we just lie on bed and talk about anything under the sun, and mind you we did this when he was supposedly in his rebel stage-adolescence. Thus, telling him the truth of his illness was of prime importance.      

It has been exactly 40 days since that fateful day.  We have good days and we have bad days. Bad days consist of the days when his platelet count reached an all time low of 8, when he had a nosebleed that literally filled a big plastic cup, when we were on our toes looking for donors for his blood products, when he developed pneumonia and liver complications, when his weight loss was over 40 pounds, when he is nauseated, when he is in a lot of pain. 

Good days are when we have quiet moments together, when we feel that we draw strength from each other, when we share a joke and smile at each other, when we share a meal together, when we pray together, when we remind each other to live one day at a time, when we kiss and hug each other, when we say “I love you”, when we accepted what is happening, when we surrendered everything to our heavenly Father.

A mother’s love…what is it indeed? It is accepting even the unacceptable.  It is the wanting to be proxy to all what my child is feeling – physically, mentally, emotionally.  It is showing a brave front to my son, to my other children, to my husband that everything will be all right even if deep inside I am so scared of what  is to be. It is being a one woman army – mother, friend, nurse, househelp, teacher, doctor, counselor, chief cheerleader, writer, PA (personal assistant), manager, spiritual guide, accountant, operations manager all in one without wage benefits.  It is surrendering everything to God but with the prayer “ Lord, I know that thy will be done.  That is why I ask that You give me more years to be Iggy’s mother. Please give him back to me take care longer. I cannot bear the thought that You will take  him away  from me this early for I know he will be with you for everlasting life…” It is believing and claiming “our” miracle to happen – Iggy’s total & complete healing.

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