Should I tell her?

Dear Tita,

I was asked to be a major sponsor at the wedding of the daughter of a good friend of mine. The wedding was a grand event so I felt I should give a gift befitting the occasion.

I decided to give an expensive kitchen appliance since I knew that the bride loves to cook. The cost made a big dent on our budget and my husband, Rudy, complained but I explained to him that being a major sponsor, I really had to give an expensive gift.

The wedding was a big affair attended by prominent members of the local society. However, six months after the wedding, I learned that the newlyweds had separated. The next thing I heard, the bride had petitioned for an annulment of their marriage. We heard that the couple had been fighting even during their honeymoon and their quarrels quickly escalated into violent fights. The bride’s parents insisted that they should part ways.

Recently, I was at the mall and saw the bride’s mother. She told me all about what happened. She said her daughter was leaving for abroad to work. She also told me that their house was so crowded with the wedding gifts her daughter left with her. One of the things she mentioned was the expensive kitchen appliance I gave to the couple, which she was planning to give away to her relative, who also loves to cook. Apparently, she was not aware that I was the one who gave the appliance.

I really would like to have that kitchen appliance since they are just going to give it away. Would it be proper for me to mention it to my friend or would that be inappropriate?

GIFT GIVER

Dear Gift Giver,

It depends.

If the mother is a close friend of yours, you could mention that you were the one who gave the gift and that if they didn’t want it, you would be very happy to have it as you love to cook.

But if you are not that close to her, then just keep it to yourself as you might be branded an ‘Indian giver’.

TITA

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