Our mother has
changed a lot

Dear Tita,

We are worried about our mother. When our father was still alive, she was the perfect wife and mother, whom we all adored. But after our father died of a stroke two years ago, she has changed a lot.

Papa was only 61 years old when he died suddenly. Mama was inconsolable for weeks after his death. She kept to herself inside her room and refused to go out. We tried to help her snap out of her grief and even sought the help of her friends to cheer her up.

One day, her old officemate, Cora, who was separated from her husband, arrived from Manila and things changed for our mother. They became inseparable and would spend the whole day out playing mahjong, malling, etc. We were glad our mother was cheerful again.

But soon, we noticed a big change in her. She became choosy about her clothes and make-up. She would come home very late and would sleep until noon the next day. Afterwards, she would dress up again for her outing with Cora. Soon, there were talks going around that Mama and Cora were seen dating other men.

Recently, our Tita Nena, the sister of our father, came to ask me what was going on as she said she heard some gossip about Mama. I was shocked by the ugly things being said about our mother. When I told Mama about it, she got very angry and quarreled with Tita Nena. She also got mad with some of our relatives, who tried to advise her about the gossip going around.

There is now a family feud between Mama and our relatives. Some of my friends even told me about the rumors regarding my mother. I feel so hurt, especially as my boyfriend’s parents heard it. What should I do?

CONCERNED DAUGHTER

Dear Concerned Daughter,

Your mother has been through a terrible ordeal with the death of your father.

At that stage, she was vulnerable to the influence of other people. Unfortunately, the one she listened to was Cora, who was a bad influence on her.

It’s time you and your siblings sit down with your Mama, and tell her about the ugly talks going around. She has to face it. Getting mad at her relatives won’t solve the problem. Let her feel that you are on her side and that you want to help her. Once she realizes how it is ruining her children, she might wake up and decide to change.

Good luck.

TITA

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