I want to be close to my son

Dear Tita,

Do you believe that opposites attract?

At 32 years old, I was still a bachelor. I found it very difficult to talk to the women I was introduced to and so they lost interest in me. When I met Dina, it was different. She did most of the talking and we got along fine. It wasn't long before we fell in love. Her parents, who live in San Carlos City, objected to our relationship because they wanted her to marry another guy from their place.

When Dina told me that she was pregnant, we decided to live together in an apartment near our workplace. It wasn't long before her parents found out and tried to take her away, but she refused to go with them. We had plans to get married after our baby was born and so we started saving for our wedding.

But Dina became irritable and difficult all throughout her pregnancy. We were always fighting and the neighbors would complain about the noise. I began staying out late to avoid quarreling with her, but it only made her worse. She became violent and would throw things at me until I stayed away for days. When she gave birth, I wasn't home. A neighbor took her to the hospital and I found out about it only two days later. I begged her forgiveness but she drove me away. I could only see our baby boy when she was out of the apartment. She refused to talk to me.

Our son was only eight months old when Dina took him to San Carlos to her parents. I tried to see them there but her family prevented it. Now, our son is already two years old and I have only seen him secretly when I had the chance. I love him very much and would like to be close to him. Dina would have none of it and warned me to stay away. What do I do?

UNHAPPY FATHER

Dear Unhappy Father,

Something must have happened when Dina was pregnant that made her hate you with a passion. Was it something you said or did?

You have some serious thinking to do. Try to find a way so you could talk to Dina and find out why she has turned against you. Once you know the reason, you could discuss things rationally and try to find how she feels about the possibility of reconciliation.

However, while I admire your desire to set things straight, I would like you to face things realistically. If there is no longer any hope for reconciliation, then you can discuss the matter of your parental rights. Try to seek the advice of a lawyer so you could have access to your son.

TITA