Her old boyfriend is back

Dear Tita,

I met my wife, Leny, at a party and I was immediately attracted to her because of her beauty and intelligence. She was different from all the other girls I met.

I began courting her and she was elusive but I was determined to win her no matter what. A friend told me that Leny was still brokenhearted because her boyfriend, Willy, had left her suddenly. It must have been traumatic because it left her wary about men. I wanted to convince her that not all men are alike. It took me four months before I was able to convince her about my sincerity. Finally, she said yes and that year we were married.

On our wedding night, I found out that she was no longer a virgin and she admitted that she had given herself to Willy, her first boyfriend. I was so in love with her that I didn’t mind not being her first sex experience.

The years passed happily and we were blessed with three kids – two girls and a boy. Leny was a loving wife and mother but she soon grew bored staying at home that she decided to go back to work. I wanted her to be happy so I allowed her to do so.

Recently, I got the shock of my life when she got a telephone call from her old boyfriend, Willy, and he visited her at her office. She told me about his coming to visit her and I didn’t give it much thought. But when he went to see her again, I was bothered. I can understand why Leny would let him come to her office but I found out that they've been meeting for coffee.

I am not a jealous person, but I don't understand what he wants. I feel she should have just said "thanks for calling," and let that be the end of it. We have never had any problems in our marriage, but I feel we might have a problem.

Do you believe in the saying, “You never get over your first love?”

BOTHERED HUSBAND

Dear Bothered Husband,

You should have a heart-to-heart talk with your wife and ask her pointblank what is going on. If she insists it’s just an innocent coffee date to talk about old times, tell her how it has been bothering you. She shouldn’t be entertaining her former BF, especially since he was the first man she had sex with.

Make her understand that this could ruin your beautiful relationship if she continues seeing him. She should remember she is now a married woman, not a free career woman who can entertain whom she pleases.

TITA