Are we obligated to help her?

Dear Tita,

Our mother died when my sister and I were quite young and we were all devastated by her death, especially our father. When I was twelve years old and my sister Nely was fourteen, our Papa decided to marry Sylvia, a widow with a 13-year-old daughter. At first, Sylvia was good to us and showered us with attention. But after a few months, her true colors came out. We could sense that she was jealous of the love that our Papa showed

us and so, to avoid conflict, Papa tried to be less attentive to us and showered all his love on Sylvia and her daughter. We felt so bad feeling like we were outsiders in our own home. Whenever we needed something, we had to tell our Papa in secret so Sylvia wouldn’t react. She kept telling Papa how lazy and spoiled we were (not true) when in fact, it was her daughter who was spoiled and lazy. During Christmas or birthdays, she would buy expensive gifts for her daughter and give us cheap ones. This went on for years until we graduated and left our home to work in Iloilo and Cebu.

We got a big shock when we were informed that our Papa had a massive stroke and died. During the wake, we found out that Sylvia had withdrawn all the money in Papa’s savings account which had become their joint account. After the burial, we were informed that Papa had left the house to Sylvia and left us some property which was not what he promised us when he was alive. We tried to question this but there was nothing we could do. Somehow he signed a Last Will and Testament attesting to this decision. We knew Sylvia manipulated this so she and her daughter would get almost everything.

Lately, we learned that Sylvia has become homeless and penniless because of excessive gambling and the expensive spending habits of her daughter. She is now asking for our help as she is sick and needs financial assistance. Nely and I are already well-established and can afford to help, but we can’t forget the past. What do you think?

STEPDAUGHTER

Dear Stepdaughter,

“What goes around, comes around”. This is so true. The law of karma cannot be denied. The decision to help is really all up to you. If you can find it in your heart to forgive her, then go ahead and help. But if the past continues to haunt you, you and Nely should have a heart-to-heart talk with Sylvia and pour out all the grievances you kept all these years. I think when she realizes how mean she had been to you in the past, she will truly regret what she had done. Someone once said, “Forgiveness is like the scent left by flowers after they had been trampled on”.

TITA