When a dear friend passes

Today we will lay to rest a very dear friend and one of Bacolod City’s admired citizens. We will accompany to his final resting place at the Bacolod Memorial Park the mortal remains of Dr. Antonio Gonzales Sarabia, civic leader, philantrophist, and outstanding medical practitioner known to everyone as the Eye Doctor who had more “charity patients” than anyone I know, being one of them.

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How do I write about Tony Sarabia when his death makes me feel as if I have lost a big brother and one of the most thoughtful and caring friends I know? When Tony and Nelly came home from the United States where they had gotten married and brought up their children, my sister Perla and I were very happy to reconnect with Nelly, who had been our high school classmate in La Consolacion College, and with whom we had always been very close. So it was easy to also link with Tony, whom we found out to be a very likable fellow.

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Within a short time after their “balikbayan,” the couple already made their presence felt, not only in their circle of physicians and civic clubs, but also to underprivileged people who needed treatment for their eyes. I remember that when I was working in a bank, I would refer our guards and service personnel with problems to him, and they were always astounded because he never charged them and, in fact, even game them medicines from the samples supplied by medical companies. This also happened after we set up the DAILY STAR, which he supported fervently.

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But I admired him a lot for his relationship with Nelly. Once he told me that Nelly was his “best friend”. I must have raised my eyebrows, because he explained, “Who else could be my best friend” We know each other and help each other and support each other. That is what best friends do.” Indeed, I realized later, that was true because there really was a bond of friendship and understanding between them. Unlike other couples who were always arguing and contradicting each other, these two always seemed in accord on most things.

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That must be why they didn’t seem to look a day older when they celebrated their golden wedding anniversary. Indeed, they looked and behaved still like newlyweds. I looked at the photo of their wedding day, and, yes, even their figures did not seem to change. I guess their goodness kept the wrinkles away. And Tony was also a very efficient, forward-looking person. I think he wanted to spare Nelly from any problems after he had gone, because he had made so many arrangements and left instructions on what was to be done when he passes away.

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Somehow, we felt like he was family, and this was because we were among the first to know that first time he had the stroke that had left him paralyzed. My brother Bing had gone to their house for dinner and when he arrived he was surprised that there seemed nobody home. The household helper told him that Nelly had just rushed Tony to the hospital, and Bing told us right away. When he again had his attack Saturday of the previous week, my sister Perla and I happened to be at the hospital and his daughter-in-law, Valerie whom we met at the cashier’s office, told us that they had just rushed him there. So we were again able to be with him and the family, although he could no longer talk to us then.

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Tony was also a good writer and now and then he would submit an item, or a poem for printing. In fact the last time we met, about two weeks ago, he said he had an article but he was still revising it. He was also very admirable in that he had this indomitable spirit. Although confined to a wheelchair, he kept up with his activities, was a very active member of the Sunshine Boys and could out-sing most of them anytime. A very religious persons, he heard mass regularly and on the morning of his final stroke, had gone to church, as well.

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Once I woke up with red eyes and that afternoon went to the clinic of his son, Mike, who wasn’t there. Later, at almost 8 p.m. they told me at the STAR Office that Dr. Tony Sarabia was in his car downstairs and wanted to see me. Indeed he was there with Nelly and he said he was told that I had some trouble, and came to check me! How could I forget a friend like that? Only recently, when the medical society had a convention in Bacolod, Perla and I were at a wake when Nelly showed up and said we had to come to the dinner and program because Tony already got us tickets for it!

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Where can you find a friend like that? No wonder hundreds were pouring into the Redemptorist Church Rectory to pay their respects and bid him goodbye. That must be great consolation to Nelly, their children Mike, Joanna, whom he waited for, Antonella and Pinson Antonio and their spouses and children. Farewell for now, Tony, we know you are now in the place you deserve to be, and where we hope to see you again.*

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