Should I tell my new BF about it?
I fell in love with Roy, my first boyfriend, when I was 20 years old. My friends warned me about him, as they said he was a playboy and was often seen with loose women at bars and nightspots in town. But I was too much in love to listen to their warnings. Roy really knew how to make me feel loved. He would call me often or text me a lot of times each day. When he asked me to go all the way with him, I didn't have the strength to refuse. I thought that by giving in, I would make him love me more.
One day, I noticed I had foul-smelling discharges that alarmed me. For weeks, I tried to hide it but it was very difficult as the smell was so bad. I was afraid to tell my mother because she might find out what I had been doing with Roy. The only person I could confide to was my best friend, who was working in a hospital.
She arranged for me to see an ob-gyne that very day. The doctor told me I had STD. I almost passed out from the shock. She prescribed the medicine I needed and told me that my boyfriend should also have himself treated. She warned me not to have sex with my boyfriend until he was cured, or else he could re-infect me all over again. I told Roy what the doctor told me, and asked him if he was having sex with the loose women he was seeing. He got mad and denied everything. Worse, he even accused me of having sex with other guys who had STD.
I cried because I felt so insulted. We exchanged harsh words and then he walked away. That was the last time I saw him. It took me a long time to get over this traumatic experience. Now, I have a new boyfriend Tommy, who is such a good and decent man. He is very much in love with me and wants to marry me. But I feel guilty about my secret, which I have kept all this time.
Should I tell Tommy about it?
I feel very sorry for you because at a very young age, you were a victim of a heartless guy, who didn't really care for you. All he wanted was a good time. He didn't even have the guts to admit what he did to you nor say, “I'm sorry”, for what he had done.
The trauma of what you had gone through will stay with you forever. As for telling Tommy about it, the decision is up to you. Do you think he can handle it? Will he still love you once he finds out? Ask yourself these questions and then decide.