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Bacolod City, PhilippinesSaturday, July 7, 2012

I lost my first love

Dear Tita,

Rene was my first love when I was 18 years old. We were very close and were considered inseparable in college. He knew everything about me and was attuned to my every mood. He would cheer me up when I was sad and shared my joys in my little victories. We even planned to marry and raise a family someday.

But it was not to be.

After graduation, Rene went to work in Manila and after a few months, our communications stopped. I tried to contact him but to no avail. I later found out that he had gotten a girl pregnant and had to marry her. I thought my world would collapse as I was hoping he would come back to me. It took me a year to move on.

Soon I met Diego, a sales executive who fell in love with me and wooed me. I agreed to marry him even though in my heart I knew I still loved Rene.

My marriage to Diego was uneventful and unexciting. We have two kids, a girl and a boy. I decided to go back to work to keep myself busy. One day, I was surfing the Internet and found Rene’s name on the Facebook. On a whim, I tried to contact him. I was so happy when he replied and we began communicating regularly.

He told me he never got over me and that he was forced to marry his wife because she was pregnant. I told him that I felt the same way. I lived for the time we were contacting each other on the Internet. He said he wanted to see me again and was planning to come and visit me. I was thrilled at the thought that I would see my true love again.

But after that, nothing. He stopped communicating with me. I looked up the name of the company he was working for and called his office. The secretary informed me that Rene met a car accident and was DOA when rushed to the hospital. I was devastated at the news that my dearest Rene was gone. How could it happen? Just as we would have seen each other again, he was snatched from me so cruelly.

Up to now, I can’t get over Rene’s untimely death. I find myself crying at all hours. Diego can’t understand why I am acting this way and he is very worried. I have no one to talk to, to pour out my grief. How can I go on?


Dear Brokenhearted,

I’m sorry for the heavy load you are carrying. But you must go on even if your heart is breaking. You have a loving husband and two kids who need you. Surely, you know you have a responsibility to care for them. In time, this too shall pass away.

You are grieving for what might have been. But that is history - you have to face the future with a positive attitude. Be strong. It isn’t the end of the world. In time, you will get over this. I can promise you that.



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